Ok, you know that whole no meat, no animal products thing… well it is getting to the point where it kinda sucks. Yeah, I am craving anything that was once alive and breathing. Ok, so not humans or weird shit, you can seriously count out cannibalism for me… no bueno. But, I have been dreaming about a burger, and asada burritos from La Villa, and Mizithra cheese and meat sauce at Spaghetti Factory… ok… so all bad foods too, but the big issue for me right now is they all have meat and/or animal products. Then today I looked at a calendar. That was probably the worst freaking thing I could have done. I counted:

          – It’s only been 9 days! Yep, 9 long days.

          – I still have 19 days to go, including today.

The Toddler’s macaroni and cheese is calling to me. The Munchkin’s chicken puree is giving me bad thoughts about delicious chicken salad sandwiches. I am at the stage where anything and everything that I can’t eat is calling me. Don’t be surprised if one night my husband finds me covered in grilled cheese sandwiches, macaroni and cheese, and chicken Alfredo.

Yeah… this will be me… minus the muscle… make the dude a chick… and… no, all the food looks about right. HAHAHAHA! (photo credit)

It didn’t help that I met with my monthly cooking club on Saturday. At the beginning of this month of no meat or animal products I knew that I was going to have this event and that would be my one and only meal “off”. And in all fairness it was seafood inspired, so the “meat” was limited to bacon. Everything else was fish and shrimp. This was good for the no meat aspect, but the animal products were in full force. Lets just say in the preparation of my dish that I was bringing to share I had the inclination to taste test some things… but, my stomach made me regret it really quickly to say the least. Even after the meal I was ok until the next morning… but lo’ and behold, my stomach took out its rage in ways I will not describe because it is not for the faint at heart. Would I do it again for the food, even though I know the repercussions? My stomach says, “Hell effing YEAH!” and my head says, “What are you stupid?!?!”

The battle continues. My head is saying, “Something pretty crazy must be in those animal products and meat for it to make your stomach go nuts like that.” My stomach’s reply, “Yeah, it’s got yummy, tasty, cheesy, meaty goodness in it. That’s why I’m going crazy. I am partying so freaking hard because I’m so excited to see those foods again.” I am pretty sure that the brain is going to win that argument, but man, my stomach. It make me want to do bad things. It can be pretty convincing at times always saying stuff like, “You can finish it, you don’t have to save it for later,” or “Don’t you worry, this won’t sit on your hips for weeks… what comes in must go out remember?!?!” Yeah…my stomach is a pain in my ass, literally.

Back to the topic at hand. I have 20 more days of no meat or animal products and I am craving the worst kind of stuff, but the reaction my stomach had to just a few items did make me wonder. What the hell man?!?!? What is in that stuff? Don’t worry I am not one of those super huge PETA people who is going to post a ton of gross videos about animal farms and stuff. I know some of those places are horrible and feed the animals weird shit. I get it, I do. But, then there are other places that don’t do that… so you can’t make me give up meat and animal products forever. It just made me wonder, you know?

There is a point to all of this though… as much as I am ready to chop up my own beef (I have a dairy farm less than a mile from my house, so I could do it, but I won’t because that’s stealing… momma don’t do that) I am going to try and ride it out the next 20 days. TRY is the optimum word in that sentence, just so you know. I can’t say I will for sure, but I am going to try. And I have to tell you all about my one night “off” at my cooking club. So let’s just say I have some pretty bad ass gals that I meet up with to talk food, family, and life with once a month. Not only are they sassy and fun, but they know how to cook?!?! Every mans dream right?!?! (Too bad fellas, we are all taken.) I met up with them and had an absolutely delicious meal. We had baked shrimp appetizers, ceviche, pasta salad, garlic shrimp rice, salmon, and my sushi and egg rolls for dessert. It was awesome. Then we had to do what all bad party people do… play Cards Against Humanity. It was awesome!

Even though these were not my photos (photo credit) this is the kind of fun you get to have with friends. LOVE IT!

I really enjoy my time out with these women because I need it, the kids need a break from me sometimes, and Mr. G gets to have boy time with the kiddos too. I got to make the dessert this time around, which was great… but took forever. I made some fun sushi and some rockin’ apple pie egg rolls. Here are the pics and the recipes:

The ones that are pink are the strawberry filled wrapped with fruit by the foot, the rectangular ones on the bottom are the ones with the chocolate cheesecake and almond topping, and then top left messy chocolate ones… those are the banana and Nutella sushi rolls. YUM!

Rice Krispy Sushi – This is another pinterest find. Well, I got the idea from The Darien Peach. I also followed the Rice Krispie Treat recipe they have here. But, the strawberry filling and chocolate topping were all me. I put together a recipe for you, so you can recreate the hours of creativity for the moments of yummy goodness. HAHAHAHA!

INGREDIENTS

Rice Krispy Treats/Sushi

3 tablespoons butter

1 package (10 oz., about 40) JET-PUFFED Marshmallows

OR

4 cups JET-PUFFED Miniature Marshmallows

6 cups Kellogg’s® Rice Krispies® cereal

2 Fruit by the Foot fruit snacks (any flavor)

Almonds (ground)

Strawberry Filling

¼ cup fresh or frozen strawberries (thawed)

Splash of orange juice (maybe 1/8 cup)

2 Tbsp sugar

3/4 cup Cool Whip (thawed)

4oz cream cheese (room temperature)

4 Tbsp powdered sugar

1 tsp vanilla extract

Chocolate Topping

2 cups Cool Whip (thawed)

4oz cream cheese (room temperature)

¼ cup powdered sugar

1 Tbsp vanilla extract

Chocolate Sauce (to taste)

Almonds (ground)

DIRECTIONS

  1. In large saucepan melt butter over low heat. Add marshmallows and stir until completely melted. Remove from heat.
  2. Add KELLOGG’S RICE KRISPIES cereal. Stir until well coated.
  3. Line a rimmed cookie sheet with foil and grease the sheet with butter. Using buttered spatula or wax paper evenly press mixture into cookie sheet. Cool. Remove foil and cooled mixture from cookie sheet and cut into rectangular pieces and circular pieces.
  4. Wrap the outside of the circular pieces with fruit by the foot fruit snacks (don’t leave any spaces between the froot by the foot, they keep it all together). After they have been wrapped, cut a small hole in the middle of them and discard the cut out piece.
  5. With the bag of strawberry filling, squeeze a reasonable amount into the open hole of every “sushi”. Chill for about 6 hours before serving.
  6. For the rectangular pieces: place ground almonds in a bowl.
  7. Use the chocolate topping and spread generously on each piece evenly with a knife or spatula.
  8. After evenly covered with topping, gently press the topping side of the “sushi” into the ground almonds. Make sure all filling has been covered in almond.
  9. Chill about 4 hours for the topping to set.

Strawberry Filling Directions

  1. Put strawberries, orange juice and sugar in a food processor and puree.
  2. Combine cream cheese, cool whip, powdered sugar, vanilla extract, and strawberry puree. Mix until smooth.
  3. Put filling in a ziplock bag, seal and cut a small slit in the bottom corner for later use.

Chocolate Topping

  1. Combine Cool Whip, cream cheese, powdered sugar and vanilla extract. Blend until smooth.
  2. Add chocolate sauce slowly to taste.

Nutella & Banana Sushi – I found this recipe on Pinterest, but I just added the Heath Shell topping. This was from Paging Fun Mums! They are quite crafty there.

Ingredients

2 bananas

2 wraps (tortillas work too)

Nutella

Heath Shell topping (optional)

Directions

  1. Lay your wrap on a bread board and slater with Nutella
  2. Place the banana on top of your chocolate coating
  3. Roll the wrap as you would Sushi (or a Burrito)
  4. Cut into 2cm sections and enjoy! (I “drizzled” very sloppily, the Heath Shell topping too.)

Apple Pie Egg Rolls – These are so good and really easy to make. This recipe was on Tasty Kitchen, and they have lots of good stuff there. I have to admit, I was a bit skeptical of the lemons, but over all… this is a great recipe. But, be sure to have some vanilla ice cream handy because it would be a great addition to this recipe.

Ingredients

2 whole Apples, Peeled, Cored And Diced (I Used Granny Smiths)

1 whole Lemon, Juiced

⅓ cups Sugar

4 Tablespoons Flour

2 teaspoons Cinnamon

¼ teaspoons Allspice

⅛ teaspoons Salt

1 whole Egg, Beaten

10 To 12 Egg Roll Wrappers

1 Tablespoon Butter, Melted

2 teaspoons Cinnamon Sugar, For Dusting

Preparation

  1. Preheat oven to 375 F. Line a large baking sheet with parchment paper and lightly spray the parchment with non-stick spray.
  2. In a bowl, stir together the apples, lemon and sugar. Add the flour, spices and salt.
  3. Beat your egg in a small bowl.
  4. Beginning with one egg roll wrapper, lay it out on a work surface (I used a cutting board) and brush egg wash around each edge. Scoop about 2 tablespoons of apple filling towards one edge of the wrapper (leave a little border). Fold in the sides and roll up the egg roll tightly. Place it on the parchment-lined baking sheet. Repeat until all the filling has been used.

Bake for 20 minutes. Remove from oven and brush each egg roll with melted butter, then sprinkle each with cinnamon sugar. Return to the oven for 5 more minutes.

Baking all nice and hot in the oven.
All done cooking, just sprinkle a little cinnamon and sugar on those bad boys and you’ve got yourself a par-tay.

These recipes are fun for kids of course, but the adults seemed to enjoy them as well. I hope you all can help me get through the next 19 days. I need to try and survive with no meat or animal products. I am going to go cry in a corner as my son eats corn dogs with ranch.

********Cue Hysterical Sobbing********

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