Dirty Thoughts

Oooooooooh yeah. That sounds niiiiiice. Mmmmmmm. Oh and just a little of… ooooohhhh my GAWD. That is exactly what I was thinking while watching the unlimited food and/or dessert commercials yesterday during the football game. My weekend has been filled with “dirty thoughts”. I say “dirty thoughts” because it’s about food that is not good for me. Chocolate, peanut butter, pasta with cream sauces, ice cream, doughnuts, etc. have flooded my brain. I had one day where I would have given anything for a freaking string cheese. I kept pacing in front of my fridge as a matter of fact (we have a whole pack of them in the fridge for the kids) and I would open the door, then close the door. That move was on repeat throughout the day.

This weekend had to have been the hardest few days so far with the Whole30 program. I don’t know if it was because my husband was home or if it was because I was getting tired of the food I had been making, but I was food frustrated. I wanted everything in sight. I wanted to go get a monster sugary drink from Starbucks and Chinese food. All things sugar, dairy, soy, and grains just called to me. My husband didn’t make it much easier. He was more than willing to share his Milky Way and had to go to Chipotle for lunch.

This weekend was one that tested every ounce of will power I had. I even went to Costco! Now, if you are familiar with Costco, you know that they are widely known for their incredible samples. We used to go and make a meal out of the trip when we lived in California. It was a smorgasbord of all kinds of delicious treats. Thank GOD they had a raw nut sample because I needed just something to deter me from the other goodies that lined the isles. Then after the kids were starving so it was a slice of cheese pizza and hotdog to share (among the three kids, not me, although I think I was drooling). The thing that made it harder was that I had to cut it up for the kids. I was the one feeding it to them. I was smelling the food, touching the food, serving the food… it was torture.

The good news about all that… I MADE IT! I survived without giving in. I really almost caved yesterday, but then I made my lettuce tacos for dinner and they were tasty enough that I didn’t need to do anything else. I was worried though. When Ben called me during his lunch at work and I was on the verge of stuffing my face with my kids advent calendar candy, but he talked me down. When I had a “craving” I asked myself, “are you really truly hungry or are you just bored,” or “are you just craving it because it looks/smells good and not because you are really hungry”. On almost every occasion I wasn’t really hungry. On the occasions where I felt I was actually hungry I would eat an apple sauce or an orange or a hard boiled egg; something small, healthy, easy and on plan.

Waking up today I feel extraordinarily proud of myself for overcoming my “dirty thoughts”. Last night, I probably would have willingly jumped into a pool of chocolate pudding if someone gave me the opportunity and I do not like pudding (it’s a texture thing). Yuck! Today I was excited to test out a new recipe in the crockpot and I was able to get my meal plan updated for week two. I feel much more focused than I was yesterday and I was able to accomplish some cleaning around the house. Tomorrow I will try and get my butt out of the house.

The more time I spend inside, the easier it is for me to look to food. I know it’s because I am bored and not really hungry, so I have come to peace with asking my “questions” before going for food. I think I will be asking Ben to help a little more with the kids dinners and stuff so that I don’t have to have my “dirty thoughts” about their food become a constant issue. I have been much better about that though. Now, I am on to a new week.

How do you stay on plan when you are at a moment of weakness? Do you have a food buddy or a partner you can call or text? I have a buddy of mine that is doing something similar and I love that I can text her and ask about recipes or tips. I need a few more of those so if she isn’t available that I can check in with them too. Do you want to be my food buddy? What have been some of your “dirty thoughts” (i.e. cravings)?

***Cheers <raises cup of water> to day 6 of 30. Just 24 days more to go!***


Talk to me...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s